No code is the best way to write secure and reliable applications. Write nothing; deploy nowhere.
Start by not writing any code.
This is just an example application, but imagine it doing anything you want. Adding new features is easy too:

The possibilities are endless.
Now that you have not done anything it's time to build your application:
Yep. That's it. You should see the following output:

Deploying
While you still have not done anything it's time to deploy your application. By running the following command you can deploy your application absolutely nowhere.
It's that simple. And when it comes time to scale the application, all you have to do is:

I know right?

Contributing
You don't.